September 11th

September 11, 2001 was, without a doubt, the worst day of my life. Not only did I happen to see the first plane hit...then the second...then find out we were under attack; not only did I feel personally attacked; not only did I feel more afraid and helpless than I ever have before or since; but there was a bomb threat that day, at the Federal Building directly across the side street from my daughter’s daycare. I was unable to locate my 4-year-old daughter for 6 hours. When I was finally able to find and pick her up, I found out that the daycare staff had walked the children DOWN THE STREET ACROSS FROM THE POTENTIAL BOMB.

Despite all the fear and emotional pain I experienced that day, I was lucky. I was able to hold my children. I was able to go to sleep that night knowing they were safe and unhurt. I think of all the parents, grandparents, siblings, cousins, children, friends, lovers who lost their loved ones that day, and I realize just how truly lucky I am that I was able to hold my children. I have not had to wonder or know that they died instantly. Or that they suffered any amount of pain before dying hours, days, months, or even years afterward. I have been able to watch my children grow up and become who they are.

Although I felt helpless and more fearful because I was not able to go to NY and help, I have not had to suffer the aftermath of those first responders who gave their own lives. Who did everything they could, but felt they could/should have done more, helped more, maybe saved just one more person. Those responders who were forever shattered by the events that they were working at. There is nothing I or anyone else can say that would not minimize the magnitude of mental/emotional trauma these police officers, firefighters, EMS personnel, and other responders have gone through.

I am truly lucky that, although I felt attacked, although I felt fear and helplessness and was forever affected by that day, I was able to be at home with my children that night. I wish with all my heart that I had been in NY so I could have helped, but I am so grateful that I was able to be with my children. I am more grateful than I can say for all of those people who responded to the Twin Towers, the Pentagon, and the plane crash; for the bravery of the passengers on United flight 93 that day.

December 7, 1941

December 7, 1941. “The day that will forever live in infamy,” according to FDR. The day the United States was pulled into World War II. This is noted by many people on Facebook with pictures from that terrible day and a few words about remembering. It is officially named National Pearl Harbor Remembrance Day, with the American flag being flown at half-staff to honor the 2,403 Americans who died on that day.

December 7, 1941 is an important date in American history. It should be held as much in American consciousness as Memorial Day and Veteran’s Day. Like Memorial Day and Veteran’s Day, National Pearl Harbor Remembrance Day should be a day to commemorate the reason it exists.

Memorial Day is marked with parades, ceremonies, and backyard barbecues –because, DUH, it’s Memorial Day.  Veteran’s day sales abound on the weekend before or after the day. Military personnel are given special discounts. It’s popular to thank a veteran on Veteran’s day. Both are federally recognized holidays. National Pearl Harbor Remembrance Day, however, is not a federal holiday. Services and ceremonies meant to honor those who died are quietly conducted.

It is time to create a resurgence of interest in December 7^th. Not so we have another holiday to cook or stampede the stores on, but so we can teach our children the historical significance of this date. It is important not only to remember those who were killed so terribly, but also to take steps that will make repeating history less likely. We cannot allow another Adolph Hitler to maneuver himself into a position of power. We must always fight to protect those who are in danger from such a person. We must always remember that attempting to prevent each other from gaining influence is not a good reason for death and destruction. 

The Election

So Donald Trump is our President-Elect. Hillary seems to have won the popular vote by a narrow margin, but he won the Electoral vote. So, whether good or bad, Donald Trump is our President for at least the next four years. I have already seen many posts on Facebook bemoaning this fact. People wanting to move to a new country. Celebrities who threatened to leave if he became President being told “Bye, Felicia! Don’t let the door hit you on the way out!” with gleeful sarcasm. People saying they are scared, angry, deeply disappointed. People saying how hurt they are that the racism, fear of LGBT+, etc. runs so deeply, as evidenced by the fact that Donald Trump was elected President. Posts saying, “Hey, thanks a lot for voting for that third party candidate, idiot! You are part of the reason we’re in this mess now!” And on and on…

I did not get to vote in this election. I recently relocated to Texas from Colorado, and did not get my driver’s license and voter registration changed in time to be able to participate in this election. The only person who is responsible for that not happening in time is me. I am not happy or sad that he has been elected, though. Whether it was him or Hillary, my life would not have changed on a personal level. There will be change on a national level because of this election that will eventually affect me, but my personal, day-to-day circumstances are not going to change based on the fact that Donald Trump is the President-Elect. My day-to-day circumstances will only change as I act to change them.

I don’t especially like Donald Trump. To be honest, I think he’s an arrogant, self-centered blowhard who just spews whatever controversial words will get him attention. I can’t stand that behavior. I also don’t like Hillary. Forget the flap about her emails; yes, that was a 3 ring circus, and I don’t think she was truthful, but that doesn’t bother me as much as Benghazi does. Her behavior regarding Benghazi, and the four military men who she seemingly left on their own to die, strikes at the core of my being. It is the main reason I do not want her to be my President. There is much criticism of both Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton for various things they have been accused of; this criticism should be considered along with the reasons for it. With that said, I was not physically there to see the bad behaviors exhibited by either one of them, so I really cannot judge either one.

Donald Trump is the next President, regardless of what I think. I am hoping that he does not act as he has said in his campaign. I sincerely hope that so many of his words were just meant to inflame public opinion and garner attention, and not actually reflections of what he will do in office. We will see. If Hillary had won, I would wait and see how she behaved in office, as well.

No matter who is in office, though, I am proud to be an American. There is a lot that needs to be changed, certainly, and it is my responsibility just as much as anyone else’s to work to make that happen, but there is also a lot of good in my country, and I am happy that I get to be a part of it. 

Veteran's Day 2016

Veteran's Day is coming up this Friday, November 11th. I feel strongly that we must more actively support our military veterans. I've seen some halfhearted support--every so often, a picture of an elderly man holding up a handwritten sign proclaiming his status as a WWII vet and asking for likes/shares will pop up in my Facebook feed. More often than not, this elderly man is white. The fact that I’m noticing his skin color is, in my mind, a terrible reflection of one of the problems in today’s society. The fact that it is more likely to be a man than a woman is also troubling. There were black and Hispanic men fighting for our country. There have been women fighting for our country. ALL of these people deserve our gratitude. ALL of these people have made great sacrifices. We should celebrate our black veterans, our Hispanic veterans, and our female veterans just as much as our white male veterans.

As I mentioned in my Veteran’s Day post last year, I actively appreciate our veterans, especially our Vietnam War veterans, all year long. And I truly believe that we do not do enough to support our veterans. We also do not verbalize our gratitude to them, except when we are reminded or it is a popular day to do so. The BLM, PLM, and ALM movements have grown in popularity over the past year. And some of the people in each of these groups have a valid point about their particular group’s goals. I’m going to add another one here: MVLM. Military Veteran’s Lives Matter. These people should not be ignored for most of the year, only trotted out on Veteran’s Day to be remembered and thanked. I would never encourage anyone not to thank or celebrate a veteran; however, I also would never condone saying or doing something to/for a veteran only on this one day of the year. It doesn’t matter if the veteran is leading a successful life or living in a cardboard box under the local bridge. He or she has sacrificed greatly for my country. For YOUR country.

Please thank the veterans you know or cross paths with. Please acknowledge and appreciate their service to this country, even if you don’t agree with the politics or the war. NEVER miss an opportunity to express your gratitude for the veteran’s contributions to and sacrifices for our society. But please make sure you do it all year long, not *JUST* on this one day of the year. Make your appreciation of them meaningful. Make it sincere. And make it real. 

First, Do No Harm

"First, do no harm." This statement is the first concept I learned in my 1991 EMT class. The point behind it was to teach the importance of not making a patient’s injury or illness worse through the treatment given. For example, if a patient has an injured leg, don’t move him until the leg has been immobilized so that it cannot be further injured, possibly turning a temporary injury into a permanent disability. However, this idea can be applied to many aspects of life.

One of these aspects of life involves what we say to others. It has long been known that words do cause pain and heartbreak. Children have been taught for many years to be careful of what they say, lest their words come back to haunt them later in life. Kids have been bullied verbally to the point of committing suicide. Words can be used in the workplace to keep employees not only from furthering their careers, but also to keep them from realizing their potential in their current positions. Words can be used at home to keep an abused spouse or child from leaving. As one of my friends pointed out, words are used to cut people with opposing political views to the quick. Words are being used to end friendships and alienate family members—over a difference of political opinions.

I have, for many years, incorporated the concept of “First, do no harm” into all areas of my own life. I have treated others gently. I consider how my actions may affect another’s life. I will choose to remove myself from someone’s presence if I am causing them angst. I have learned to choose my words carefully, and will walk away from someone rather than say something rash in the heat of the moment that I may regret later. I make it a point to share my thoughts and opinions when invited to do so, but I do not attempt to sway the other person to my political or religious views. I may attempt to convince another that my way of completing a task is right, but I am more likely to complete the task myself rather than impose my way of doing things on others.

In her Facebook post, a friend noted the extent of vitriol spewed over opposing political views. She reminded those who read her posts that we all have differing opinions, and issued a heartfelt plea to those who read her post to take care that they remember to love each other, and not divide themselves over political ideals. My friend has a valid point. The upcoming election will determine who becomes our next President, but the division over the election will continue on for longer than the new President’s term in office. Families are being torn apart, friendships forever destroyed—over an election that will soon be no more than an event in American history. Does the outcome of this election have the potential to cause America more problems in the long run? Yes, absolutely. Does it have the power to bring about change that can improve the American way of life? Again, the answer is an overwhelming yes. There will likely be good and bad repercussions of this election no matter who becomes President. The problems that come about from this election will eventually be solved, in some form or another. However, the broken families and friendships will remain so for years, if not lifetimes to come.

Words are being used to do irreparable harm. It is time to stop using words as knives. It is time to consider how our words affect others. It is possible to share viewpoints without verbally assaulting each other. Debating classes and clubs have existed for years to teach students how to convince others of their own positions. None of these debates have included using words to hurt others. Students can learn to thoroughly research their positions and back up their opinions with such research. When arguing with others, insulting people is more likely to cause further division than to convince them of one’s own point. It is more likely to hurt feelings than to sway the other person’s opinion. It’s time for us to fall back on the tenet I first learned in my EMT class: “First, Do No Harm.”

My Heart is Heavy with the News

He's a Black man! #BlackLivesMatter He's a cop! #PoliceLivesMatter

This man's life matters. Whether he's Black or a police officer or (as is the case) both, he has a family that loves him and wants him to go home safely each night. Yes, there are people in this country who are keeping racism a problem. Yes, there are people in this country who are exhibiting reverse racism. But we are ONE NATION. We should not be continuing the division among classes/groups that is currently going on. I try not to force my views on others, but this country will fall apart if we allow such division to continue. Honestly, if I had seen this man's picture without knowing he was injured by the Dallas shooter, I wouldn't have looked at it and thought, "oh, he's Black." I would have looked at the picture and thought, "Oh, the poor man! I hope he's ok!" I'm not "color blind." I can see that he is Black. But the person he is, whoever he is, has more meaning to me than what color his skin is. Politically, I'm a registered Republican. My morals and values are more conservative than not. I think, however, that we need to reunite as a country to fight the detrimental forces within our country, not break further apart like ice floes in the Arctic Ocean. At one point, the Democratic Party was meant to bring the country together. Now, the Democratic Party seems to encourage divisiveness. I'm pretty sure I could do some extremely superficial, brief research and find examples of the Republican Party doing the same thing. This is not an attack on either party. Or an attack on any of the .....LivesMatter movements. But we can't focus on one specific group. We have to work together. We have to appreciate our Black people, our White people, our Native Americans, our Latino/a people, our Asian people, our emergency personnel, our military, our ... The list goes on and on.  

Officer Montrell Jackson. Also a police officer. Also a Black man. Brutally murdered on the job. HIS life mattered. To his baby. To his family. To his friends. To his coworkers on the Baton Rouge police force. We cannot keep killing each other like this. Officer Jackson’s life mattered AT LEAST as much as Alton Sterling’s or Philando Castile’s lives mattered. We cannot keep turning against and killing each other. Forget BlackLivesMatter, PoliceLivesMatter, or even AllLivesMatter. It’s time to consider these people as individuals. Fathers, brothers, sons, friends…and so much more. My heart breaks for Officer Jackson. Not just because he was a police officer or a Black man, but because he will not be able to enjoy his child growing up. He will not be able to see this child’s milestones, or what this child grows up to be. Because he will not be able to barbecue with friends and family. He will not be able to bring joy to those around him. He will not be able to do any more good in his community. My heart breaks for his family, his friends, his baby.

Photo of Deputy Clopton taken from Police Officers Facebook page 

https://www.facebook.com/PoliceOfficersUS/photos/a.1201662653206628.1073741828.1199323963440497/1275207315852161/?type=3&theater

Photo of Officer Jackson taken from US Weekly website

http://www.usmagazine.com/celebrity-news/news/baton-rouge-shooting-three-police-officer-victims-identified-w429559

Valentine's Day

Complaints about the commercialism of Christmas are all too common. People complain about others “taking the Christ out of Christmas.” Bumper stickers, Facebook posts, and television shows talk about the commercialization of the holiday. This is an annual complaint that has gone on for years. However, there is another holiday that has been completely commercialized, and much more effectively than Christmas—Valentine’s Day.

When one thinks about Valentine’s Day, flowers, romantic dinners at expensive restaurants, and jewelry are what come to mind. It is expected that the husband/boyfriend will provide these and other material gifts to the wife/girlfriend. If flowers, heart-shaped boxes of chocolates, expensive jewelry, and other gifts are not provided along with a candle-lit dinner at a favorite restaurant, the couple will be extremely unhappy. It is popular to ask the question, “What are you doing for Valentine’s Day?” and to expect a response with the name of the person’s favorite restaurant.

Many people, myself included, really don’t like Valentine’s Day. In my opinion, it is so overcommercialized that the original meaning has been lost in the mists of yesteryear. Not many people, it seems, even know who St. Valentine was, never mind that the holiday was created in his name. David Kithcart, the 700 Club Features Director, quotes Father Frank O'Gara of Whitefriars Street Church in Dublin, Ireland as saying of St. Valentine that “he was a Roman Priest at a time when there was an emperor called Claudias who persecuted the church at that particular time” (2016, as cited by David Kithcart). According to David Kithcart’s article, Father O’Gara states that the emperor had issued an edict prohibiting soldiers from marrying, and that St. Valentine had secretly married couples to discourage polygamy in spite of this edict.

Another significant, yet unrecognized, event that occurred on Valentine’s Day is the St. Valentine’s Day massacre. On February 14, 1929, seven men were gunned down in a garage, an event that was ordered by Al Capone ("The St. Valentine's Day Massacre", n.d.). Despite the fact that this was a gang killing, and the seven men killed surely were not innocent of wrongdoing, the massacre was an event that has made its way into the pages of history.

Today’s Valentine’s Day celebrations do nothing to commemorate either the creation of Valentine’s Day or the massacre now associated with February 14^th. Instead, stores and commercials focus on selling boxes of candy, stuffed animals, flowers, and greeting cards to consumers. The items for sale are usually set up on display during the early part of January; advertisements are seen and heard almost constantly beginning around the end of January. If we as a group are concerned about the commercialization of holidays such as Christmas, should we not also go back to the roots of St. Valentine’s Day? 

References

Kithcart, D. (2016). St. Valentine, the real story. Retrieved from http://www1.cbn.com/st-valentine-real-story

The St. Valentine's Day massacre. (n.d.). Retrieved from http://www.myalcaponemuseum.com/id27.htm